Please Do Not Urinate on the Seat

Alright, we all know that I am not the delicate type. I am brass, straight forward, blunt, and extremely sarcastic. At work my sarcasm spills over into the halls like the rain flooding my front yard right now. But I will tolerate quite a bit before I just say screw it and draw the line in the sand. The perfect example of my point would be the bathrooms at work. I work in a very nice building with very nice bathrooms, well they were nice until the phantom pee-er came along and then before I know it there is pee every where. Yes, every where. Well, I have been working late quite regularly these days and the last thing I do before getting in to my car is stop off in the bathrooms and when I am tired from a long day of work I am not focused on looking for pee on a every surface. This scenario managed to play out twice before I hung signs clearly visible in every area of our bathroom. The signs are polite and yet too the point "Do Not Urinate on the Seats." (And I should have thrown in 'or on anything else' but it was a moot point.) The signs, though they caused a small scandal with the mystery over who hung them, seemed to work for a few weeks. A few weeks, but a few weeks is not forever. That was the line in the sand people, and the phantom pee-er has crossed it. Soon the signs are going to be changed, soon the signs are going to get mean, and soon I will be arrested for hanging out in the bathroom trying to catch said phantom in the act. This does not bode well. I know you will be waiting in anticipation to see how this goes.