So Many Kinds Of Wrong

I have known a lot of deviants and sickos in my days, in fact that is a requirement before a person can count themselves amongst my friends. My friends are a different breed of deviant then the ones I always post about up here. I have been unfortunate enough to run across a few that I do expect to read about in the news one day, I suppose that is just a casualty of growing up in California. However the fruit cake I read about in the news today might actually beat all of the deviants and sickos I have known or known of in some strange animal fornicating genre. Dear readers, in today's news I bring you the dead deer f*cker story.

Brian James Hathaway, a man with a new reason behind hunting, has been convicted for having sex with a dead deer. And if you all have the same mental image in your mind that I do then I am sure that you too are wondering exactly how he managed to hold the thing up. Deer are usually heavy and lets face it the only alternative to lifting it up to thrust would be another very awkward and uncomfortable position involving bare knees and a lot of rocks. Oh yeah, I know I'm turned on, I think I'll run out and go hunting right now. As if the dead deer sex wasn't enough, this guy has a prior conviction for killing a horse with the intention of having sex with it. So he's a repeat offender and he is escalating, watch out for your moose around him. He gives a whole new meaning to horse back riding doesn't he? After reading this article and finding myself both equally amused and disturbed I could not help but think, at least it just seems to be a fetish for dead animals. At least it is not a fetish for dead people.

In the normal events of my life, today is one of those days humanity should be happy that I do not carry a gun on me at all times. I would be one of those people who shot a large portion of the herd and then ended my spree in a hail of bullets. Well, not really, but I might shoot one particularly annoying person today in the knee. I prefer to make them suffer.

I have to pack after going to the gym tonight, and my head already hurts just thinking about it. Who in their right mind likes packing? It is the biggest baddest game of tetris out there, except the pieces are not all perfect and they don't flip, drop, or move at the touch of a button. Blah.

I dreamt about the next Harry Potter book last night. They had put it out on the shelves but they were refusing to sell it. For a moment in time, dream world or not, I thought about doing something very unpleasant to a book store. Blasphemy. I woke up feeling guilty.